News » Match Reports: Round 9 2016

Match Reports: Round 9 2016

Match Reports: Round 9 2016

By Matt Young

How good is waking up on a Saturday morning in June with a smile on your face, knowing that the day ahead consists of sipping a few Martini's on Mylopotas Beach, losing yourself into a classic piece of literature by George Orwell and spending the evening gallivanting around with beautiful European women.

Unfortunately that wasn't the case on Saturday and I awoke from my night's rest to a steady drizzle, thickish fog and a sarcastic text from a mate saying 'I love football'. After briefly contemplating retirement I got up and by the time I had rolled down to the Lady, I'd decided it was a great day for ex-Tasmanians and was looking forward to the encounter against the top-of-the-table Old Mentonians.

Simple, clear messaging in the pre-game from Jon 'my dinner's always in the oven when I get home from training boys so it doesn't matter if you have to cook your own at 8.30pm' Knight and his ever growing tribe of pulchritudinous coaching staff [Editor’s note: Youngy has obviously been spending too much time with his head in a thesaurus. Pulchritudinous describes a person of breathtaking beauty; fair to say it’s a bold way to describe our coaches] had the boys primed and ready to go. The bookends were back with Jock 'I want that hypnotist guy to put me under every week' Grimshaw and Alex 'If I was Jock's Mrs I'd be concerned' Herd helping the OGs get off to a flyer taking a 4 goal to 1 lead, before a couple of late goals by the oppo left the game about as close as Jimmy Wright's sides after his Friday afternoon trip to Dr Follicles, at the quarter time siren.

The second and third quarters continued to be a bit of a heave-ho with the OGs seeming to have most of the possession but like Jason 'rolled my ankle at half time so I didn't get dirty' Barry we were unable to put them away. The last quarter was a different story and after again putting the first one on the board we also put on the second, third, fourth and fifth with George '41 trying to tag me is amusing' Burbury relishing in the Hobart-esque conditions.

Special mentions to Ryan 'Need another 6 on my back' Parsons for his job on the oppositions prime over and the two Youngmen for having a day out in the mud, leaving me pondering how good it would be if I had a twin so I could facade to having twice as many possessions every week.

Overall it was a great team effort with the win and subsequent rise into the top 4 being celebrated by a crisp Furphy's post-game and more than one player being overheard saying 'I love football'.

The things I enjoyed:
Kicking the first goal of every quarter
The OGG's defensive pressure leading to one of the best collective team efforts I've played in during my time at the club
Parso's effort on number 10
Hoof stamping some verbal authority on the game

By Tom Hays

Last week at training, the OGs’ spiritual leader Andrew Power provided a much-needed pep talk to the boys. He said, "Winter is coming, and we will lose some good men to the beaches of foreign lands over the university break. Our season will be made or broke in the next month."

Truth time had arrived for the Ressies against Old Mentonians. In a pre-match interview, the media gathered round the revered coach Lefty Wright asking, "are they the real deal?" "will Evans ever step up?" and "does Holmes realize the goals are between the taller posts?".

Although Old Mentonians at times proved elusive and capable of playing rebound footy, the Ressies understood the responsibility they possess to put on a show for the onlooking valued Pivot Members.

It proved difficult to locate the goals in the first half kicking five goals and 15 points. With visibility at 100 percent, Tom "feed me" Wigan was baffled, but manage to sink one when it mattered. Luckily Joe Kemp, Jonny Graham, and Andy de Fegley were all well fed leading into the night's festivities with two goals each.

Although Lady Como had transformed into a battleground fit for mud wrestlers, we were privileged to see some high flying mark attempts. Returning from injury Angus Smith ambitiously sought to defy Newton's theory of gravitation as he left clear of the pack only to see the waterlogged ball slip through his hands, at which point gravity took effect returning him safely to his natural habitat in the mud pit below.

Although Will "two goals, 11 points in two weeks" Holmes did not have much to boast about, he continued to provide a competitive lead off half forward. As if the heavens had opened up and were inviting him for tea, Holmes seemed to hover 2 metres above the ground for at least a minute as he towered over his opponent taking one of the greatest marks ever to be witnessed in VAFA football.

With John "all your finance needs" Forster sadly being missed, it was a day for the tough-nut, in-and-under players like Michael Mccormack and Hamish Guthrie to bash and crash. Racking up 57 possessions between them, the Old Mentonians midfield called a crisis meeting, but nothing could be done to stop the unstoppable Mccormack-Guthrie train - toot toot!

Regarding doing things right by the team, a focusing captain's speech by Benny Millar at half time and on field direction went a long way to secure the 88 to 31 victory, locking in the second position on the ladder and two games clear of third.

In a post-match interview, Luke Hooke was asked what it meant to be an Ogger. He replied, "It is about being courageous and accountable, and also valuing the significant camaraderie at Club that will propel our team forward in the weeks to come. Stay hungry. Stay thirsty. Learn from losses and enjoy the wins." Couldn't agree more.

By Harrison Stewart

Coming off a great away win against St. Bernards, the Under 19s were looking for another scalp this time from Williamstown who were a top 4 side. This week we went on without coach Matt ‘Border’ Collister who went to Tassie to watch Richmond get absolutely dominated. The Unders also welcomed in a few new players to the side.

It was a very wet day down at Como Park and Rupert ‘Furphy’ Kebbell summed it up best when he said, “it’s going to be a muddy day boys”. After an inspirational speech from Ben ‘I’ve coached the majority of you before’ Thomson we ran out to what was a great quarter of football. Maxim ‘the package’ Jones miraculously overcame a shoulder injury last week and looked dangerous early, kicking our first goal and dominating the ruck. Ed ‘win a hard ball mate’ Keach got some cheap handballs out the back from some of our in and under midfielders and set up some great passages of play resulting in early goals for the OGs. The back six (back six get the chicks) got to take a break, rarely seeing the ball in the opening quarter and not letting through a single point.

The second quarter was more of the same, Luka ‘Candyshop’ Thorpe was cutting shapes you wouldn’t even see on Dancing With The Stars, around a lacklustre Williamstown team. Gus ‘I don’t bother with undies’ Beckingsale was putting a clinic on at fullback, not getting within 50m of the ball all quarter and playing a real lockdown role. Ted ‘strap-in or strap-on’ Strapp was being hit up beautifully on the wing by our backline and set up a few plays that resulted in more OGs goals. Jono ‘I’ve kicked 29 goals this season’ Thomson was getting hungry for a goal and trying some absolutely impossible snaps with no success. Williamstown did manage to score a point during the second quarter, which will lead to 400m sprints and push-ups for the team this week at training. OGs went in to halftime with a comfortable lead but knew the job was only half done.

The third quarter started with Tim ’I’ve had the same skins since under 11s’ Breadmore kicking this week’s nomination for goal of the year from the centre square. Max ‘Zyzz’ Newman was carving up Williamstown in the forward pocket, providing lots of run and excitement. Beckingsale was still putting on a clinic 100m away from the ball at full back. Lachlan ‘na my hair is naturally blonde’ Lloyd was slicing the Williamstown halfbacks in two with his silky skills and agility up at half forward. The backline responded from what was a poor second quarter and kept the scoreless again in the third quarter.

The fourth quarter was the George ‘what’s a handball?’ Manton show, which is in town all season if you haven’t had the opportunity to see it already and rates 4.5 stars on IMDB. Manton kicked 3 early goals to comfortably give the OGs a 100 point lead for the first time this season. As the lead clocked over to triple digits it was clear to see that bulge in Ben ‘I’m coming for Knighta’s job now’ Thomson’s pants getting bigger. Ed ‘I love possums’ Gubbins had taken off early to go celebrate his one week anniversary with his new GF and left the backline under siege from a high octane Williamstown offence that managed to kick two late goals – de-listings will need to be made. Shaggy ‘just give me the B&F already’ Tivendale was everywhere in the final term, looking to boost his super coach score in junk time. As the final siren blew the Under 19s won comfortably, putting us 5th on the ladder ready for a finals push in the second half of the season. Was great to sing the song in the rooms after and cover the new players in water to celebrate a huge win for us and hopefully one of many more to come.


By Cam Sherwin

After two consecutive away games caused some initial confusion around the venue, we had a few players arrive fashionably late, and were a player down until the mid-way point of the first quarter.

The slippery conditions made things difficult in the opening half as we adjusted to the foreign Parkville turf, but our midfield worked us into the game with Matt “Honeymoon” Graver and Jimmy “Con” Cave getting in and under and winning it out of the mud pit of a centre circle that looked like something out of John Forster’s dreams. Inaccuracy proved a curse for some of the Oggers with Josh “Plugger” Archer kicking 0.5 for the half, but we entered the main break with a 61 point lead thanks to Ed “Mojo” Smith snapping truly and solid forward pressure from the likes of Ed “Wears a Borat suit in his spare time” Simpson and Louis “U-turn” Chiodo.

The second half was all on our terms as the opposition tired and Arch got on top with a few early goals in the third, and finished with a haul of five for the afternoon. Thom “3 hours sleep” Claeys shook of his hangover and chipped in with a long range goal on the run from the arc. Our backline held up strongly with Willy Mason shutting down anything that came near our defensive fifty and Harry “can tackle” Hosegood leaving our opponents in fear of having the ball in their hands when he was nearby. Donald “best left foot in the VAFA” Sahlstrom cleaned up across half back all day and even made a cameo appearance in the forward line to snap a beauty.

A solid team win on the road as the Clubbies juggernaut continue their march towards September. Best on ground went to those who braved the questionable communal showers shared with the opposition after the game.

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